Together with Sister Teresita, I watched a concert in celebration of the mission of SPC in the Philippines. It was not really my plan. I wanted to go home early and sleep but I attended because it was an opportunity to explore how St. Paul Manila looks like. Its neither enjoyable nor regretable, good to taste but boring. What excited me however was the deeper message of the concert: celebrating the mission of transforming the lives of people and seeking strength to continue with the work. I pondered on this and I too have much reason to be thankful. Despite my lack of training, I was given the chance to teach in Saint Paul and those years were fruitful ones. I’ve learned more about myself and others. I was commended and criticized which in the end widened my perspective and made it more balanced. Ironic but I’m looking forward to end my teaching stint in Saint Paul and move in a new direction. Of course I will miss a lot but moving on is a character of an authentic person. I don’t want to be comfortable because it is not who I am. All along I thought that the secluded life is the one meant for me only to realize that living  is to be present in the world. I will never regret being in Saint Paul and meeting all those wonderful people but I am compelled to discover what lies ahead. I want to say good bye but every time I think of it, I cannot but cry. Though not emotional, anxiety overwhelms me. Its undeniable that Saint Paul though good, had hurt me in varied ways, leaving is not to escape but a necessary bridge to filling what needs to be filled in order that the life inside me may shine brightly. As much as I want to, I will try with very little time, change my space so that in the end, towards the point of no return, though I cry, I remain standing and though dying, live anew.